Complicated

Dear Non-Existent Readers ;)
I really hate love. It's so confusing. I was meant to post on Sunday, saying how happy I was, and then something terrible happened. Well, I forgot, and then something even possibly worse happened on Tuesday. About love, obviously. Yes, you probably guessed it already. My boyfriend and I broke up. And then got back together again. Let me explain it from the beginning...
So, I had this sneaking suspicion that he didn't love me anymore. I don't know what it was, whether it was how he seemed to be backing off a lot, or how he treated me differently then before. Because of this, I texted one of my guy best friends, who was also friends with my boyfriend. He's good at advice, see. Anyway, I told him that I'm just not sure that he loves me anymore, and my guy friend said these exact words: "Okay. he definitely doesn't love you as much as he used to. You used to be all he could talk about, but now, it's just not the same."
Anyway, so on Tuesday, I confronted him, but, being the nervous person I am, I slipped up and told him that my guy friend said that he didn't love me anymore. Later on, my friend and I told him exactly what we said, and my boyfriend (by the way, I'm not trying to sound obnoxious when I say my boyfriend, I'm just don't want to say names, so I'm saying that instead) said that maybe I should trust him and walked off. i apologized to him, but he was still angry at me. Then, he broke up with me because apparently, I don't trust him, and I deserve better. Which is nice of him to say, because he thinks I can do better than him, but it still hurt.
When I got home, I grabbed the ice cream, turned on the music, and cried. Cried so hard that I I couldn't breathe anymore, and I felt like I would never be happy again. That type of crying. It made me send him a text, saying so much for forever. That text turned into a confession, a lot of long typing and, after a while, we were back. Back to what we were only a few hours before.
You know, everyone kept asking me if I was happy, and i expected, just as much as everyone else, that i would answer yes to that question. And, don't get me wrong, I was happy. But I was still sad. Do you understand what I mean? I felt like my heart was still being stitched up, and there was still a lot of anger inside of me. I'm not sure why.
Yes. That's what has happened in my life recently. Oh, and my poor guy friend and boyfriend weren't friends at the beginning of today. My guy friend felt so bad that he didn't sleep and cried all night, and when I tried to get my boyfriend to be friends with him again, he wouldn't listen. So that was really depressing. But when I came down from my OnTrac, they were talking, so I stood against a pole, and listened. I only heard them say mates and shake hands, but even so, I was so happy that I hadn't ruined their friendship. I'm such a silly girl.
Well, that's it for now, readers. Goodnight, sleep tight and definitely don't let those bed bug bites.
JBass :)